I feel such peace and relief after last week's (tantrum) breakthrough.
I realized that before when thinking about my goals, it was like I had to list-as-many-as-possible-in-the-shortest-amount-of-time-as-fast-as-possible. Like being in one of those wind machine cash games - "Grab as much as you can!" I had to get them all listed, all done, all checked off! And since I couldn't do them all at that exact moment (when I brought them out in the middle of the night), I'd pack them all away again and feel defeated.
Now, I feel like I'm easy going, reclining in my porch swing appreciating the beautiful beach view and I have whispered to the wind my First Goal and I know it's being prepared for me. I still have the passion and excitement, but I don't have the angst and pressure like before. I feel peaceful and calm. I know by focusing on the first goal, rest will come in the right time and in the right order.
Also, this week I have decided to celebrate my successes and not worry about the misses. I made myself a weekly calendar to list all the MKMMA assignments and I have colored and highlighted what I accomplished. So I can see all that I DID DO. At the end of each day I review and ask am I pleased with my choices today? Always the answer is "Yes!" - because those are the choices I made. I can't change them, no point in berating myself. Practice building yourself up, not tearing yourself down. Then I tell myself I did the best I could today, and tomorrow I will grow a little more and do the best I can then too. And everyday I will grow and my best will grow too. That's why hind-site is always 20/20 so you can learn and evolve from each situation. Practice getting better. As Abraham-Hicks says "You can't get it wrong. And you'll never it done." That's what evolving is all about.
I also see the importance of the chore cards. For 2 months I complained and procrastinated about the mess of products under my bathroom sink. So that's what I put on my chore card and you know what - I got it done that very same night! Then when I read the chore card for the rest of the week I could say "Yah, I do keep my promises - and this is what it feels like".
I have a room that I have dedicated to be "my Zen room." It's filled with all my wonderful books, candles, and flowers, and all my favorite things that are me. But guess what -it's buried under a bunch of crap right now (Golden Buddha anyone?). So my chore card this week is to start sorting through the boxes. Not "Clean the whole room and get it done!" but break it down into small easy steps. Steps I can easily accomplish that aren't overwhelming.
Take time to do each step with loving care. That's the journey - every wonderful step of the way.
This week: Go through the boxes.
Next week: Build some shelves.
Week after that: Take over the world.